Remember me? The bitch is back! Uh, I mean, the Dating Diva is back! The aforementioned relationship I found myself in over the summer didn't make it much longer than a month (I'll spare you the details) and I've once again found myself single. At first I thought, "No problem, most of my time is spent at work or in school" but then I started to get a wandering eye. I would peek at the online dating sites and see who was out there. I pondered if I should reactivate my online dating profile. "Just for fun," I told myself. So I did. And I was reminded of why I disliked internet dating in the first place.
One guy sent me a very simple, yet direct, message: "I wanna fuck you." Was I flattered? Sure, why not, but not interested. My profile clearly states that I'm not looking for booty calls or casual sex so why did he even bother? He probably sent that exact message out to several women, hoping that at least one would say, "Sure, let's meet!" If that woman is out there, then she is the woman for him. But that woman isn't me.
Another guy appeared to have actually read my profile as he commented on my mention of an MG and my ability to drive stick shift. However, he said to me, "Im a sucker for brunetts, but i dont belive you can drive a stick, mg is totally different from a Cts-v with 500hp." Wow, I don't believe you know how to proof your messages before you hit SEND. But forgiving that, I'm pretty sure the way to a woman's heart is not to mildly insult her abilities, nor is it to brag that you probably have a Cadillac. So, thanks but no thanks.
One man used the short but sweet approach with a simple, "Hi." Really? You can't even say, "Hi, I'm Bob. Would you like to chat?" or "Hi, I like chili!" (I referenced in my profile that I make good chili.)
Why is internet dating so hard? Read the profile of the person you're reaching out to, show them that you actually paid attention. If you're stuck for an ice breaker question, comment on the current cold snap in the Los Angeles area (seriously, 36 degrees in the valley this morning?!), talk about a recent sports game (apparently it's not looking like the Lakers are going to make playoffs, although I only know that because I googled it so I'd have a sports reference here), or ask me what my favorite things are (band, food, cocktail?).
Because simply saying "Hi" comes across as not wanting to put too much effort into this dating thing; making comments that are directly opposed to things in my profile shows you didn't even read the damn thing; and insulting me is not going to endear yourself to me.
Thankfully there are one or two guys that know how to have a conversation so I'm starting with those. Will anything come of it? Who knows, but at least we're making an effort. It would be nice if I could meet someone that would go to Robbie Burns Day at the Tam O'Shanter with me, or someone to stroll through the Norton Simon Museum with. I don't mind doing these things alone but it would be nice to share them with someone special. And it would be nice to fall in love again.
I'm not entirely sure when I'll have the time though, as I'll be taking five classes this semester (that's outside of my full-time job, mind you) but I did post a disclaimer in my profile. I explained that I work full-time and am a full-time student so I won't be running off to Paris with anyone...at least not until summer break. ;)
